Integrity

Should you pick the apple or the bar of chocolate?

If you are like me, doing the wrong thing is seductively easy.

Imagine getting hungry in the afternoon and having to pick between an apple and a bar of chocolate. You KNOW you should pick the apple. But just the thought of chocolate makes your eyes go 😍 and leaves you feel warm and fuzzy.

There is nothing wrong with picking the chocolate. Except when one of your major values is physical health.

You value health = you should pick the apple.

The choice becomes one of integrity. It's about acting in line with your values and doing the right thing.

Of course nobody will say you are a person with low integrity as a result of picking the chocolate. But even small decisions like this illustrate the gap between your values and your actions. What if the decision was between writing your thesis (apple) and browsing social media (chocolate)?

Today, we will explore what integrity means, the challenges you face in maintaining it, and the steps you can take to lead a life of integrity. Enjoy!

💡 Reflecting on Integrity

(Like always, you can download the Notion template of this Monthly Introspection to take structured notes.)

What does Integrity mean to you?

This is your personal definition of the word Integrity. How do you know that you or others have it? How important is it to you? Can you give examples of how you have demonstrated integrity in your life?

In which situations do you struggle with consistent Integrity?

Think about areas of your life where integrity is hard to maintain. When have you compromised your integrity and why?

What steps lead to a life of Integrity?

Think about someone you know with high integrity – what can you learn from them about it? What is your default response to situations that challenge your integrity? How would you change your default response to maintain integrity in the future? Think about specific and actionable steps you can take.

✨ Member Insights: Personal Relationships

Each month, we showcase a Mental Garden member's reflections from the previous Introspection. To begin, I will share my own insights on personal relationships. If you would like to be featured in the next edition, please reply to this email and let me know.

During the last Introspection, I realized that the people who are truly important to me are the ones I spend the most time with. The amount of quality time I spend with someone directly translates to how close I feel to them. I am quite certain that by spending more time with these people, the relationships will become more rewarding.

I was surprised to realize that I do not know what my friends think about themselves on a deeper level. What are they struggling with from a broader, big-picture perspective? Do they like who they are, and who do they want to be? To help them become that version, I want to ask – and I’m extremely curious what they’ll answer. This is a great opportunity to learn something new about them, and then help them become that version.

🙏 Thanks!

Thank you so much for being part of Mental Garden! I hope you found this Introspective useful. Like always, if you have feedback just hit reply and send me an email. I read every one of them.

As you might have noticed, regular reflection is an important part of having integrity. How can you decide if you don't know what your values are? Reflection is understanding why picking the apple is the tastier option.

This is exactly what I’m hoping to help you do.

Expanding on Monthly Reflections

I'm currently sending you only one Introspection per month on a specific topic (like the ones on Personal Relationships and Integrity). Next month, I want to expand this with another, more general reflection that helps you reflect on the last month and plan the month ahead. This is quite similar to the Yearly Reflection but on a monthly basis.

I’ve tried this for the last six months, and it was the best new habit I built in 2022. As a result, I’ve got more clarity and more motivation while removing a lot of procrastinating.

This means that you’ll get the next Introspection in just two weeks, and the new more general reflection at the end of the month.

See you in two weeks – I wish you a great and happy weekend!

With gratitude,
Marc